random rant

i should be sleeping by now.
DA is on duty.
i just cant seems to close my eyes.
wanted to talk to him till we both fall asleep like everyday.
this feeling worries me
as there will be time difference once i go back in 2weeks time.
remember how to live your life without DA ,please
i have to be strong
i just have to focus on my studies
everything else can wait
meanwhile,
i succesfully made 2 big jars of honey cornflakes for raya
DA requested to try some
cos he never get the chance to try my cooking, poor DA, one day u will
and helped big sis made mini popia isi serunding and kerepek gunting
i prefer honey conrflakes though
cos the other 2 kuih is so troublesome
left me feeling angry and tired
and tomorrow, almond london plan with syikin
we will see how it goes
i love doing things that are simple
yet fruitful

these past few days, adik asyik terasa with me
its all because i started to tegur2 dia psl kerja rumah
homework and household chores. both
thing is, she is not even fasting, yet she can laze around not doing anything
once asked y xtlong, she replied,xckp, mana org nk tau kena buat
i jus dont get it
anak bongsu mmg cmtu ke
and today she raised her voice to mom when mom asked her twice about something
i pun panas ati la, dahla panas bru blik pasar minggu peloh2 tgahari
i ckp elok2, xpyhla emo cmtu kt mak. then dia jwb, mak yg mrh dlu. i jwb lg,kalo jwb awal2 td kn, xdela kna mrh n mak kn. org tnye asal berat sgt mulut tu nk jwb.
dats all, and she locked herself up in the room for hours.
dgn hempas pintu nye.
omg, tercabar keimanan aku

thing is, benda simple mcm ni xptot buat gduh
tp dia ni pantang org tgur
i pulak lately asyik penat
xlarat kena jd driver sana sni
balik2 umah tgok bersepah, pening la n perangai dia lg


i dont know la when is she gonna grow up
i pray that one day she will understand all these

my bad jugak sbb xcover2 lgsg tgur dia
i just sound her directly
sory la adik
yah penat n stres nk kna blik uk da
tgok the way she behave around the house, sian kt parent aaa
satu kerja xleh tlong
baju2 dia pn mak yg basuh, sidai, angkat, lipat,iron

grow up please
org len tngktn 1 sume da msuk asrama

dats y i cant stand looking at u online men game berjam2 smbil kurang ajar n orglen

adeh

sori la ye yah da xlrat nk sabar
xreti nk guna cara lembut da

yg lg sorng nk spm
lg pening kepala pk
n result exam yg merisaukn

aiyo

adik2 sendri ni, kdg2 lg susa kite nk ajar dari ajar anak orglen
myb siblings rivalry
pepun, i just want you all to be successful in ur academic, get scholarship, further studies, get good jobs, live better life.

enough of this rambling
my eyes are so tiny now that i cnt even read the things i m typing

with raya just around the corner,
n kenduri few days after dat
and leaving home a day after that...
tension is slowly creeping out and building up in myself
i have to maintain my composure
i dont wanna hurt anyone
especially not people i love the most

i dont mind about my attire pelamin or my make up for that day,
but i do care if anyone creates drama melayu lak nnt
especially when the extended family is expected to join along
im not that close with them
but from experiences so far,
i just pray that noone will bring me down by any negative comment or badmouthing
or foul-language among them

byk complain, mmg cari pasal
itu ini serba xkena
kritik bukn membina, sume berbaur hasad dengki and hasutan
berpuak2

i dont care if u have been living like that ur entire life, as long as u wont tarnish the event with that kind of attitude

stay away

i mean it

i dont wanna feel bad on that day
nnt DA jugak yg kena pjuk

ok.

lega sket da let go benda2 runsingkan ati ni

it seems like this blog is more like a diary of my sad life

benda2 yg i cant share with others personally, i managed to let it go writing in here
not trying to membuka aib orglain or ape2 seangkatan dgnnya.
jus dat i need a medium to channel my negative thought
don't read this blog if u expect to read all the happy things happening around the world, i mean it